Body Slam
When you're an 11 year old diehard wrestling nut in the midst of not only Hulkamania but Macho Madness, even a Dirk Benedict movie sounds exciting.
Death Sentence
"Having avenged his family, Cyborg Kevin Bacon and his half a teaspoon of remaining blood drive home to watch 'America's Funniest Home Videos.'"
FoxTrap
"Foxtrap" is most easily broken into three chapters: 1) there's Fred Williamson, 2) there's a few other characters, 3) Fred Williamson kills the other characters.
Celebrating Jack Lalanne
Jack is no longer the kindly old man who makes sure we juice things. Now he's a jumpsuit-clad Big Brother, forcing us to consume raw vegetables and swim two hours a day or risk being turned over to the Ministry of Love.
You’re The Inspiration
I do not, under any circumstances, recommend watching this video. No rack of delicious ribs could be succulent enough to take the pain away.
Cocaine Cowboys
The late 70s. Drugs. Terrible rock music. Jack Palance. Andy Warhol. Even more terrible disco music. A nerd getting doused in baby powder by a semi-nude maid. I'd go on, but this frightening description is making Cocaine Cowboys sound more interesting than it actually is.
Galaxis
The lady from Ace of Base is out for justice!
Truck Turner
While it's got a lot of the trappings of your run of the mill blaxploitation film, it's more than just a Superfly knockoff starring the guy who wrote the theme from "Shaft." It's Truck Turner, and if you'll pardon my ridiculous movie critic pun, this Truck is no ordinary ride.
Abraxas: Guardian of the Universe
Chaos theory is now writing movie scripts!
Hooked On A Feeling
And you thought bird flu was a global epidemic in the making - holy hell, the world is being invaded by clones of David Hasselhoff!