There are two very important notes here: one is that John Waters’ version of “Jingle Bells” is very deliberately based on the the Singing Dogs version, the one from the 70s where every note of the melody is “sung” by a barking dog. The one that has repeatedly been named one of the most annoying holiday songs ever recorded. John Waters barks “Jingle Bells” like the dogs in that song.
Which brings us to the second note: the cover says “Please don’t listen to this record.” Don’t say he didn’t warn you!