There are lots of holiday songs about mishaps that almost cause Santa or his helpers to miss Christmas, but Texas swing performer Reece Shipley’s Cold War carol goes a step further, helpfully pointing out that if World War III breaks out, Kris Kringle probably isn’t going to drop off any presents.
It’s a pretty frightening premise, though it’s not the only Cold War/Christmas crossover. John F. Kennedy once wrote a letter to a kid that was worried the Reds would bomb the North Pole and nuke Santa. “You must not worry about Santa Claus,” the president wrote. “I talked with him yesterday and he is fine. He will be making his rounds again this Christmas.”
In fact, Shipley wasn’t the only person to write a song about this idea, as there was also a song-poem called “Santa Came On A Nuclear Missile”! Though Shipley is, as far as I can tell, the only guy whose song refers to the world’s nuclear arsenals as “cotton-pickin’ missiles.”